Feeling Grateful

There are many days when I long for a dear friend to get together with to talk about life and what is going on in it these days. I miss having girlfriends who are experiencing parenthood at the same time I am and who know me well.

In my pre-marriage and Ella days I had friends who were married and had children, but most of them lived in adjoining states - New York and San Francisco to be precise. Locally, I cultivated friendships with other single women - many of whom have no desire to have children or probably get married. Since having Ella, I still see them, but I think we'd all agree it is different though they have been my friends for 15 years. My life has simply moved onto a different track and while we do get together for dinner or a pedicure once in a while, we won't be taking girl's trips to Spain together of going, spur of the moment, to a local watering hole to hang out.

I know I'm the type of person who tends to have fewer, but closer friends that I've known for a long time. Being casual acquaintances with people was not something I ever did well. My mom will be the first to say it was hard to plan birthday parties for me as a kid because I only wanted my best friend there. College was the first time that was ever really required of me and I can't say I felt totally successful at it. I never enjoyed going to dinner with people I didn't know well. In all honesty, I would rather have eaten alone. Over the years I've gotten better at it and have a fairly big circle of people that I know and enjoy, but those I hold near and dear are those I can get close to and form a lasting bond.

Today my desire was fulfilled when I got to chat with my friend Bronwen. We met 19 years ago this month when we started college and lived in good old Marshall Dorm. It is amazing to me that we've known each other that long, when in some ways college feels like just yesterday.

I so appreciate her friendship because our relationship has stood the test of time, relationships, distance and a whole host of other things. There are plenty of years when we probably haven't seen each other more than twice a year, but we've always caught up by phone and it is as though no time has passed no matter how long we go between chatting. Though we've been there for each other over the years, I think in the past 5 years we've really come to appreciate the friendship of the other in a way we never had before. Though our lives are so very different in some ways, we are similar people in our core.

In any event, it felt like a spot of my soul lit up when, after weeks of phone tag, we were able to catch up. There is just something wonderful about getting to talk with a person who just gets you and knows your history so there's no back story needing to be filled in when you talk. It makes me grateful for the friendships I have invested in and so glad to talk with someone who has a life that is somewhat like mine.